


EMPEROR NERO x MR JOHNSON

by greybin12, trashcan77



Category: Ancient History RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:01:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27438523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greybin12/pseuds/greybin12, https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashcan77/pseuds/trashcan77
Summary: mr johnson is teleported to ancient rome and falls head over heels for a certain sexy emperor.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

mr johnson x emperor nero

Chapter 1  
sammy was a lonely man. after a long day of failing to educate his students, he was reapplying his hair oil. he put on three times a day, hoping that it would fix his hair line. he sighed and walked away - what he did not realise was that his remaining hair oil was dripping off his greasy head and into his mug. it was his favourite mug, one with a painting of emperor nero on the handle.  
he took a sip of his smelly green tea  
and sighed once more. “roit,” he said, “i should probably mark those gorl’s tests.”  
he walked off at the pace of a snail and drinking his tea, he noticed a strange tingling sensation in his prostate glands.  
“wot the f-“  
there was a flash of light, and sammy was gone.


	2. aynchent roem

sammy slowly fluttered his eyes open. His head was thudding and aching. What the hell had happened to him? It felt like someone had drilled a hole through his skull. The floor he was sprawled on felt strange too, hard and smooth unlike the Trump 2020 flag he normally slept on. Slowly, he opened his shit coloured eyes and took in his surroundings. He was in a vast, grand hall of pearly white marble and ornate gold decorations. The walls were lined with tall, snowy columns and the floors were decorated with vibrant mosaics. High above was a huge glass dome. Golden rays of sunlight streamed through the shards and shone on the marble.

“Is this ancoint groice?” sam barked, internally applauding his excellent history skills.  
“Are you dense? This is Rome. Fucking idiot,” somebody grumbled behind him.  
He shifted around to see a tall, spindly man with thin white hair and the face of a decayed corpse. He was wearing a white and purple toga with golden sandals.  
“Who are you? Wanna learn about substitution?” Mr Johnson asked.  
“Who I am is none of your business, piggy boi. You remind me of an American. Obsessed with oil. Is that why you support Trump? You want some of the Middle East’s oil for your traumatically ugly hair?” the old man snickered.  
“How do you know who Trump is? He was born at least 200 years after the fall of Sparta. We are in Sparta, roight?” Sammy demanded.  
“Oh my jolly gosh how dumb can one man get. I worry for the future of humanity. Anyway, I am going to do old people stuff now.”

The oldie began to shuffle off. Sammy breathed a sigh of relief. Finally he didn’t have to talk to such an idiot anymore. Imagine not knowing the difference between ancient greece and ancient rome? Suddenly, the senator fell to his knees and began gasping for air.  
“Oh noooooo! Old man please don’t leave me you are my one true love! my world will be dark without the fire of your beauty and wit lighting it up! nooooooo you cannot die what will i do!!!” sammy wailed.  
“I-I did tell you I was doing o-o-old people things,” the old man croaked out. His emerald orbs were growing duller every second as the sweetness of life faded from his angelic, perfect body. Sammy cradled his frail form in his arm, sobbing and weeping and staining the senator’s toga with his tears.  
“I’m going to need so much copium after this tragic event,” he moaned like a bitch boy. 

Then the old man died.  
“F,” said sam, but the letter barely made it from his pouty disgusting mouth as he was crying and coping so hard. How would the poor maths teacher ever recover? His everything was gone. His world was gone. There was nothing left to live for. Sammy began becoming suicidal but then he started coping. Oh, life was such a trial.


	3. Galegropha 'goat-face' Nero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hi, im the co-creator, i wrote chapter 1 (sorry it's so short lmao)
> 
> this chapter is about a teacher who's name i've changed  
> im annoyed with her for taking my beanie so i've decided to put her in the fic
> 
> tw? asphyxiation 
> 
> thanks for reading :)))))))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is about a teacher who's name i've changed  
> im annoyed with her for taking my beanie so i've decided to put her in the fic

Galegropha Nero was not your typical aunt. she was a MEAN aunt. unluckily for the emperor, she was HIS mean aunt. when he was born, she slapped him harder than necessary and he suffered severe head injuries, which could explain a thing or two about the man's intelligence levels. the neighbourhood kids called her 'goat-face,' and when the toddlers misbehaved their parents would tell storied of old goaty reaching into small children's bedrooms at night and robbing them of their respiratory organs.

galegropha was a short person, around 4'11. she wore a long white robe and a navy blue scarf. but no yellow. NEVER yellow. only black, white, and navy.

so, in our story, we have left sammy shrieking in the street, wailing over the senator's dead body. this didn't look too good for him, and even worse luck brought him Galegropha Nero.  
as she marched down the street, looking for her next victim, she heard sammy and thought he might be easy prey. she thought wrong. mr johnson, as he often told his own reflection, was an incredibly clever and strong, 'manly' man.

Galegropha was sneaking up on him, as quiet as possible, which wasn't very quiet, and was around two metres away when he started to smell something. 'i recognise that smell,' he thought to himself, 'that's the same hair oil as mine!'  
yes, that's right, galegropha uses the same hair oil as sammy, in fact, she uses even more than him. he whipped his head around, cracking some bones as he went, and stopped his screeching immediately - galegropha was brandishing a beanie. he stood up to his full height, which was extremely tall, he said (he was only 5'4), and towered over galegropha.  
'wot the fock do you fink yor doing mate,' he said in a squeaky voice, and snatched the beanie. galegropha lunged at him, and he stumbled backwards. she kicked him in the shins, and he punched her in the nose.  
galegropha's eyes watered. she couldn't let him have that beanie. it was YELLOW, and that was against the rules. she headbutted him in the stomach (yes , that's how short she was) and he toppled over, winded. 

sammy had a short temper, and galegropha was testing his patience. 'roit, that's it.' the dreaded three words left his dry lips. galegropha knew she was done for. standing up again, he loomed over her, and she tried to run, but he caught her by the hair. it slipped away in his hands (the hair oil, remember) and he shrieked with frustration. he sprinted after her, catching her again, and sticking the beanie over her nose and mouth, he started to suffocate her.

galegropha struggled, kicked and scratched, but her efforts were wasted.

goat face was no more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading, i think this one's short too, but im not sure (i've never written before) so sorry about that
> 
> next chapter will be written by greybin12 :)

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for how short it is, next chapter will be much longer :)


End file.
